MAY 29 2022
Hares: Mr. T, Secs, Bull Ant
Hash Flashers: Chom Chom, Chippy
Ringmaster: Chom Chom
HIGH STAKES AT HO TRAM!
A widely anticipated visit to Ho Tram was precipitated by a forward party of Hashers who felt it necessary to reconnoitre the intended route one night in advance. These high net worth individuals acted as Hares and were led by Bull Ant, who apparently recently absconded from a rehabilitation facility run by gamblers anonymous.
The Hashers of more modest means assembled at the celebrated Tommy's Bar to do the donkey work of loading the coach with stores. After the long bus ride the hoi polloi of Hashers arrived at the salubrious Intercontinental Grand. They were greeted by the well-heeled Hashers at the five star hotel, and one of whom was seen to mouth -"here come the riff-raff!". Secs was seen to assure the hotel management that the 'common folk' of Hashers would not be allowed to disembark the coach and would be moved along quickly before they could lower the tone of the establishment. Secs called over the hotel duty manager, pointed at HotLips at the front of the couch exclaiming 'oh look, there's my butler'. The affluent Hares regaled the ordinary decent Hashers with stories of 7 course buffet breakfasts, these stories impressed the obviously jealous and hungry peasant folk on the bus.
Hashers arrived at the start of the hike in good spirits. The trail up the hill began with a flat path through the trees until Hashers were greeted by crime scene style tape blocking our path. As the 'Enter not allowed' text on the tape was deemed to be grammatically incorrect Hashers decided this would not stand up in court. The Hashers, hereafter to be referred to as 'the Defendants', challenged the laws of trespass and continued up the hill. When the trail became steeper, Hashers needed to climb up inclines and pull themselves up rocks. Mr and Mrs Snail were seen to jump up and across the boulders shouting 'parkour, parkour' at each other. All present enjoyed the view from the top of the hill and we managed to keep the children away from the edge.
The way back down became very slippery in the mud and some confident male hikers who had been very brave on the way up were now waving jazz hands and squealing like little girls, while actual little girls were pushing their way past. At one particularly hazardous point, Lucifer slipped and hit the ground so heavily it made the earth shake. Nearby observers became self-appointed judges and graded a 9, 8.5, and 10 - for Lucifer's spectacular dive. The difficulty of the terrain brought up a conversation of the many old injuries and ailments of the Hashers which alerted the organisers as to the need for medical waivers in the future.
All were very happy to get back to camp and particularly to enjoy the delicious meat filled buns. Some of the more adventurous decided to go for a swim and Chippy did a reenactment of the iconic James Bond movie scene of Raquel Welch emerging from the sea. She was later seen being chatted up by a surfer type person at the campground and had to be chaperoned.
After a quick circle and photo of attendees for litigation and summons purposes, all boarded the bus. DJ Chom Chom entertained all onboard with his compilation of wedding favourites 1994 mixtape. One distressed child was heard to ask his mother what the terrible noise was, "it's the Bee Gees, darling, -Tragedy". "Tragedy?....mummy it's bloody awful".
The godfathers of the Hash at the front of the bus appeared to be exercising a form of prohibition and when beer had to be distributed to the back of the bus a considerable amount of cash seemed to change hands. Also, the buy now pay later scheme was invoked when late fees were collected under duress.
A stop was requested for a comfort break and when the men were outside of the bus there were reports of snakes seen. The wives on the bus assured all not to worry as these were very very very small snakes. All arrived back at Tommy's Bar and dispersed by their rank in the new social economic order.
RUN 1010 GALLERY
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